were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
