i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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