ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
