...so i touched it.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
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