This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Its about making memories worth repressing
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
