That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
