i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Let's paint friendship bongs
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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