did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Randomize
