I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
