I seem to have left my pride at pride
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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