2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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