I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
