you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
