What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
