Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
