I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Drunk is not a location!
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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