At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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