You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
