Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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