There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
