you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
