I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize