He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
