you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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