Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
