I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
