do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Did you just see the Batmobile???
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize