I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
