ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Come share oat with me in your robe
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
