We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
