The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
