No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
