no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
