no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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