is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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