I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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