Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize