How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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