the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
