Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
