Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
