okay pat passed out under dana's car
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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