We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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