I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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