maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Randomize
