Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
