but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Well I just put wine in my tea
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
