You really coming over, don't trick.
3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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