But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
As shirtless as possible
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
