Pants 0. Shit 1.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
