Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize